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Saturday, December 19, 2009

i got the answer finally.. (cont.....)

Again... Assalamualaikum....

I'm back... lambat ckit sbb menyembang ngn mmbe2  tadi... it's good to share this last few moments with them, flashing back all da memories with our trainers... hehe~ -END- i'm not gonna talk bout this topic further more, coz it's not the thing that i want to talk now in this topic...


still remember bout the guy that i used to write before..? never mind even if u don't... as long as i know which guy i wanna talk about today... huhuhu~ we have quite a big quarrel last few days... not really few, but almost a week if i'm not mistaken... i guess that's the answer of my prayer that i asked for since last Ramadhan... alhamdulillah... of course i was sad, disappointed, and hurt... but deep inside me i felt relief... at least i know where to put my heart n focus now... i don't ever wish for things to be like this... but Allah know what's best for me... i only hope 'he' will forgive me for cannot be a fren that he wished to have...

that night, i still remember i went back room at almost 4am to settle out all the questions in my head... actually we already had a fight quite a number before that night... i would say almost every time we chat together, it will end with no good... honestly from my heart, i really like to be his friend... but to stay as my fren, it is a necessity for the person to accept me the way i really am... i dont like to cheat people with no reason... if the person is willing to accept every truth that i would like to say, then i'll say the truth with no doubt... coz the thing that i also hate most is misunderstanding... i dont like to be blame for something which is not my fault... or at least not totally my fault... without trying to even ask me or searching for the reason of my act, he straight away judge me just like that... i can accept it... it's okay if i'm the one who felt so bad treated that way... i used to it... so i don't really bother bout that... but i'm worried bout his condition... would he be okay or not with the misunderstanding... i hope he'll be alright... i love him as a fren... and of course will always hope the best for him... i was thankful to Allah for being fren with him... i appreciate the moment we talked and discussed together... rasa syg sgt terpaksa lepaskan frenship ni this way... but what to do... it's his choice n i have to respect it... i won't ever leave my friends behind unless i'm confident that they will be safe... i might not call or texting, but Allah knows what in my heart... how deep my thought for them... that's enough already... what i do, i hope i do it for MY LOVE... not for the other reason...

"kelukaan itu perkara biasa...
zahirnya pahit namun masih ada manis yang tersisa...
kemanisan yang tak ternilai harganya...
adakala tusukan kata yg diterima..
menghiris hati menetak jiwa menambah gelora...
biarkan darah itu mengalir semahunya...
lepaskan saja segala yang terbuku di dada...
tiada manusia dilahirkan sempurna...
terima segalanya dengan hati yang redha...
kata orang masa pasti mengubati segalanya...
biar diri terluka...
namun jangan sampai kelukaan itu...
turut melukakan mereka yang tidak bersalah...
pendamkan sahaja segalanya...
dan serahkan pada DIA YANG ESA...
sampai ketikanya...
jalan keluar menuju bahagia pasti kan ditemui jua...
 yakinlah padaNYA..."


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I was born on 5 Muharram 1407.. sweet and cute lady~ haha~ just joking... common and moderate... a little servant of Allah.. love art... complicated~~