Thursday, July 13, 2017

Dealing with Heart Break

ألسلام عليكم ورحمة ألله و بركاته

I am back..

And it seems as if whenever I return here, there must be something terrible or aching my heart is happening..

Yes.. Correct! That's true.. I'm dealing with another heart broken.. It'd been few times since my last writing about heart break.. 

Most of the time I must had written it somewhere.. If not in here, in my book. For the fact of knowing that if my heartache failed to be addressed and poured out, I will sink and it will bite me from inside.. And I won't be just broken, probably paralyzed too.. And as His humble servant, despite of being so down! I can't harm myself because my body doesn't belong to myself. Instead it is amanah from Allah to be taken care of. 

Alhamdulillah.. 'ala kulli haal wa nikmah..

I have this habit of searching videos or talks or speech or sermons which could help me overcome my situation. WHATEVER tough situation I face, this is one of the ways I seek help for myself.. 

I came across to this one video which gave impact on me.. Why heart break happen?

Last night was the second time I listened to this and just like the first time, I cried and cried and cried (being me~) for the Mercy that Allah is showing on me.. Alhamdulillah! I can't be grateful enough.. 

Yes I'm still hurting inside but Allah will heal me.. Just as Ustadh Nouman mentioned down here, 

Brother 'Imran was right.. better to be heart broken now then in the hereafter.. 

Better that Allah smash your heart now so He can mend it back and guide me back to His Complete Love.. He's The Most Deserving and yet we always give our love and attention to these temporary dunya.. How ungrateful we are, aren't we?

I made lots of reflections upon myself.. 

About all that I ever wanted in my life.. About my final destination I wish to go to.. What exactly my life is for.. 

Through all these videos I was listening to, Allah made me remember all the hardships that our Rasul went through.. 

One of my favorite surah is Surah Yusof.. Always, when I listened to that Surah, I was trembled.. Realizing that what I'm facing is so little as compared to what Prophet Yusof a.s. was dealing with.. Also the suffering that Prophet Yaaqub a.s. went through and yet he has his ultimate trust ONLY to Allah.. Allah alone..! 

And our Prophet Ibrahim a.s., was tested to sacrifice his beloved son Prophet Ismail a.s. for the sake of Allah.. And BOTH of them, submit to the command with no slightest hesitation..  

All I ever wanted in my life is Allah's blessing, His Rahmah and Mercy on me and those whom I love and care. I wish to die in the best condition of iman and taqwa.. 

If the hardship I'm facing would take me to that final destination I desire for, I will take it.. If this is how Allah want to improve me being a better servant for Him, I will accept it.. He won't let me alone by myself.. Even if this whole world may leave me struggling on my own, My Lord won't! He's always on my side, whenever I reach on Him, He will be there watching over me.. Because He is The Most Merciful, The Most Forgiving, The Most Everything!

As I'm reflecting myself, I realize about the importance of forgiveness.. being able to forgive..

I'll be writing that in my next writing inshaAllah... :)

Those who come across my writing here, i seek little bit of your du'a for me.. May Allah make ease everything for me, for you, and for everyone.. ameen!


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I was born on 5 Muharram 1407.. sweet and cute lady~ haha~ just joking... common and moderate... a little servant of Allah.. love art... complicated~~